1.11.2008

My mother

Well, I havent been online much lately, so I havent given an update on my mom. Since the last blog about finding her cancer, we have found out sooo much more. Her cancer is not only in her bones, it is in her liver, gallbladder, pancreas, lymph nodes of the lungs, and both sides of her brain. And not just a spot here and there, it is large masses. She is not going to live, and will only be with us for a few more months, if that. I am so sad that she has to be in pain or be sick while she is dying. We are keeping the pain under control with lots of morphine. But she will still have to go through so much to make it to the end. But I am staying right by her side everyday. I dont want to miss a conversation or a smile. She is my world, my best friend, we are two of a kind. I am going to miss her so terribly much. I have to keep myself from thinking about how much I will miss her right now, it hurts so bad. I am in a super care-giving mode right now. All I can do is be with her, make her comfortable, make her smile, tell her how much I love her, and feel blessed for each more moment with her. I am so thankful that we have this time with her to say anything that needs to be said.

I have many people that I need to call back, if I havent called you I am sorry. Ive been pretty busy out at my moms everyday. She will probably want more visitors next week. This week she has had alot of nausea and it makes her uncomfortable to be around people. We are hoping to get that under control soon.

I want to thank everyone who has lending a hand or an ear or a hug. I love you all so much. I have amazing people in my life and am soooo blessed to have you. I will try to update more often if I can.


Lots of Love,
Laura